I've been dealing with cancer for nearly 2 years now and I've been struggling with the word survivor. I am not medically a survivor, although there are no visible signs of my cancer I'm still on chemo pills and still dealing with the side effects. I don't want to take away from those that are empowered by the title of survivor. I guess every day you make it could be considered survival. What I struggle with is the meaning of survival. Finishing cancer treatment feels like walking away from a bad car wreck, you may be alive but that doesn't mean you're whole. I've had my friend die of this disease, I've lost sleep, body parts, and now my long term girlfriend. On top of that I'm in constant fear for my life. I feel deeply wounded mentally and emotionally. I feel like that struggle will never end. How can I survive when I feel like I've lost so much of myself? Is being a survivor simply living to fight another day? That's all I'm running on right now, an instinctual need to survive. Yet that doesn't feel like enough. Just getting by doesn't feel like living. If you've been clear for a few years or can sympathize with where I'm coming from please respond.