Thinking of the Future

Does anyone else who is in remission have a difficult time thinking of the future? I am six years post diagnosis and have taken every proactive measure I can but yet I find myself driving this car in circles and cancer is the passenger that can't give me directions. I just feel as though the future I thought I was to have was completely eradicated by this disease and I am afraid to think beyond today. I am not saying this is a completely bad way to walk through life. I wake up everyday and choose to make it a good day but I get a lot of grief from peers and coworkers for not wanting to buy a home, or marry any time soon. I can't explain to them that perspective is something I have gained and what I hold important in my heart may not be what they do. Sorry, needed to vent a bit!

Comments

  • 3 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • I'm two years out and have a tough time thinking of the future as well.  I want to think about it and move forward but just seem stuck.  Part of it I think is when I got sick I had so many plans and was about to begin a career I thought I loved but now I really don't have much of a desire at all most days to start that same career.  I have no idea what I want to do with my life.  I can't explain to all of my friends and family what I'm going through as they think I'm all fine and great now and back to the way I was before I got sick.  I keep telling them I'm not but they just don't want to listen.  If I ever mention anything of my issues from my cancer I always get the response "well at least you're here to feel this way" as if that's supposed to make it all better. 
  • Exactly!!! My medical oncologist offered me a job about a year after chemo. I started as a receptionist and have moved my way to practice manager. While I love my job, I do not want to do this forever. I seem unable to see myself a year from now. I think it's my way of protecting myself because I don't want to fall like I did. I've worked myself out of a really dark place in my life and I am content taking everyday at a time. It's everyone else that just cannot understand that. I'm selling my car & quitting my job in December to move to Guatemala in January. I can't live and breath cancer any more.
  • Try to do whatever you like...whatever make you happy. I am trying to do that and i am happy. I do not want to worry about future. I did quit jobs i disliked and avoided people i donot like...but now i am happy. From my life what i learned is 'we can not make people understand what we have gone through, but we will definitely able to find those can understand us. Do not care about what others think or say. Your happiness is what really matters...so doo whatever you like...

Leave a Comment