So 5 years ago I moved from Maryland to Massachusetts. In November of 2016 my brother called me to tell me my moms been sick and they think she has cancer. We talk for a while and I call her. A few days later mom tells me they ran some tests and they think it's a gastric problem.
December 19th my brother calls me again. "I think you need to come home. Moms pretty bad off and this is probably her last Christmas".
Christmas Eve. I spend my birthday on a 7 hour car trip home. My mom has lost about 90 pounds. At five foot ten she's now about 130 pounds. She's tired she sleeps a lot.
A few days later she meets with an obgyn cancer specialist. He wants to have her get a hysterectomy (So?) because they think she's got ovarian cancer. So he scheduals her surgery for Jan 11th.
On Jan 4th I hear someone getting sick. I get out of bed and look. My moms laying on the bathroom floor vomiting and pale. We take her to the E.R. They admit her and after running tests they giver for 2 units of blood as her hemoglobin as at 5,3 they keep her till surgery.
The obgyn comes in after surgery and tells us. Her body is so riddled with tumors that they couldn't remove everything, and her gulbladder was dead. He removed what he could to biopsy but if it's in her stomach there is no hope.
Well. The pathology report came back on everything he got as metastatic. He wants his associate who is oncology to treat her.
Mind you we've nit been given a straight answer as to WHERE the cancer started.
So far since Her surgery on Jan 11th she's been in and out if the hospital 3 times Each time needing at least one unit of blood. This last time feb 1st. She's had to get a unit of blood and an iron injection. We've stil not been given a diagnosis or prognosis.
The obgyn cancer specialist says she needs to start chemo now or she won't last more than 2 or 3 months.
The oncology specialist says she's too weak for chemo she needs rehab. Without getting her strength up she will not last through chemo.
Both doctors have told us that chemo won't cure her but may give her some relief and a few more months.
My biggest problems with what's going on.
1 she's been having issues fir 2 years and has had so many tests that saw nothing. 2. We've yet to be given a straight answer as to EHAT she has. 3. The hospital wants to send her home even though she has internal bleeding they can't find the source of.
The encologist has an appointment Monday to put a porta-cath in, but they can't now. They found fluid on her lungs that needs to be drained do the doctor said they will have to wait another day or two.
How are we suppose to make a choice between rehab, chemo, or even hospice when we can't get an answer to what the hell is going on?