I've had Hodgkin's lymphoma this year will be 5 years and I'm ready to start dating it hard because I'm not about to get out and meet new people and people from my past don't understand I'm not that person I once was#1i can't room about like I use to #2 I'm not a charity case #3 you're an ex for a reason cancer if
Isn't going to change that.... #HELP I'M COMING UP ON MY 36th birthday in a week and I want to go on a date that's my wish#helpme


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  • I am sorry dating or relationships with cancer is tough! I'm 30 in treatment for metastatic melanoma the past 5 years and I've given up on it completely, I was in a relationship at first but it didn't last. I enjoy male friends but I make it clear up front that's where I draw the line now, I don't have energy for more.

    I definitely had trouble at first with others understanding I had changed quickly with my cancer diagnosis... I used to goof off and wrestle before but after cancer I just didn't feel like it. I found I had to correct people that treating me like the old me multiple times before they got it. One friend (ex) that hadn't seen me for a long time I flat out told "you weren't around you don't know me anymore"... He got quiet and obviously reevaluated his behavior.

    Unfortunately even just looking for people to game with some with disappear when they hear CANCER, recently had that happen. My philosophy is I don't care to waste my energy on people that don't care or can't handle my cancer and honesty!

    I sincerely hope you find a special someone, even if it takes time to find the right one - you absolutely deserve it and I think everyone has something to offer :)
  • I've had an interesting experience with dating - but both gave me hope.

    I met a really nice guy and our second date was just a couple of days after i receive my diagnosis. As I was telling him, I gave him an "out" and I explained that I would understand if my situation was too much for him. But, he looked at me like I was crazy! He was kind and understanding and was still very much interested in seeing me.

    Unfortunately, he didn't last long - things ended for reasons unrelated to my cancer.

    However, I went on a first date with another man just a few days before my surgery. I, of course was honest with him about my situation and gave him an "out," but he was wonderful too! In fact, he sent me flowers in the hospital and, while I was recovering at home, he either texted or called every day to check in on me. He didn't push me to see him while I was recovering (and honestly, I'm glad, because I am not sure I would have been up for that). But, we had our long-awaited second date on Valentine's day and things had been great.

    While the first guy didn't work for me, both he and the sweet guy I'm seeing now have given me faith that there are good guys (or good gals, depending on your preference) out there who are kindhearted and emotionally mature enough to handle all of the baggage that we cancer patients carry.

    I know I've been lucky to bump into two good ones (in a row!) and that there are probably a lot of people out there who won't be capable of being with a cancer patient/survivor, but don't give up. The right one is out there.