Surving boredom or loss of independence

So when Ben, my husband had a seizure in 8-10...speed forward to now...he can't be left alone still working on seizure meds. He cannot work or drive. We are both stuck at home. We never know what's going to happen next. So now he can't do the things he loves like ice fishing unless one of his few friends comes here to get him and is willing to take on the responsibility of having a "sick" person in their care. Needlesstosay he has been one time this season. It was the happinest day of the past several months. Time goes by fast but so slow at the same time. My stomach is in knots so much of the time cuz I never know what's going to happen next on top of dealing with everything! We are running out of short term disability through his job, which I'm guessing will also end soon. Then SS is not moving quick enough to let us know either way if he will get disability through the govt. So not looking forward to any of this...dealing with it alone. So Ben has always worked we'll be married ten years this sept. together 17 years. I'm 31 and have always done the housewife thing. So NOW What? I might have to financially figure this out and take care of us physically at the same time. Our 8 year old daughter is right in the middle of all this, holding on but very much affected by all of this everyday. I can't do things with her like I want to or used to. The only relief I do get is to pick up meds and get groceries. We are so bored...and broke at the same time. Stuck in this house cuz it's 0' out. Scared to do things anyway cuz who knows what will happen. Getting past the fear isn't easy.
Trying really hard to be happy and find something positive about life, I know my attitude is affecting everyone around me including Ben and our daugther. It does make a difference if I'm sad and out of it or happy and uplifting. I am having a very difficult time finding that part of myself again. I know we have to find a new normal and make the best of our life now. How do we do that? If it takes time, how much time do we have?


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  • I don't really have any long-ranging or truly insightful advice... just that I know it's hard and you will make it through.

    I was thinking though, maybe now would be the time to start some new family traditions? Maybe there is something fun and simple that your family can do together... even something as small as playing a card game after dinner. I think something like that could bring you together for a little bit and give you "time off" like time when you don't have to think about cancer and are creating a little piece of normalcy. When I'm stuck at home, the best is when my friends come over and tell me all the latest gossip. It just makes me feel like I'm not out of the loop and it's fun! Even though it's insignificant in the big picture, it means a lot. So, maybe you could find something simple your whole family could enjoy together, as a way to keep enjoying each others' company and taking the stress out for a little bit.