crap ass week

It's been a bad week already...and it's Tuesday. Bleh early morning MRI yesterday, Ben was so tired cuz he agreed to getting an EEG yesterday too, so he was only supposed to have 5 hours sleep...no cafeine to him means no sweet tea or chocolate BUMMER! But he did it. He went through it all...on the quest to get his right to drive again. He has sooo much riding on this EEG, we haven't gotten to worrying about the MRI results. He feels like he's in prison. We live in a very rural community where oh yeah it's exciting he can ride a bike up toe Casey's, for those of you who dont know that's a gas station with food & Froggy's our ONLY local food place. But it's not enough for him. He feels like so much has been taken away from him. And he has even gone to not trusting me like I'm feeding the Drs information about seizures OR that I don't want him to drive. Like I'm not being supportive. Well I guess if there situations were reversed I don't know, I've seen him go through hell and back and again. So yeah do I have a fear or underlying knowledge that he might have a seizure and kill someone else or himself yep I do. I fear that. And it's not just anxiety talking it could happen. Not because it's what I want because he has a friggin tumor in his brain! Neither one of us asked for this crap. Trying to live with it...not fun or easy. Which I guess we should just focus on the fact he's still living. And walking and talking. He has gotten a year since his DX which they told us could have killed him sooner than later if he wouldn't have gotten treatment when he did last August. So trying to focus on that.

FRIG life sucks somedays!!! MRI results Thursday, Neuro Dr. next week to see what the EEg said unless they call us with something to say about it?! We will see. sigh

STUPID CANCER!!!!!

Comments

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  • So sorry you're having a bad week- waiting and worrying is terrible but I'm hoping for the best for Ben and yourself. I grew up in the country so I know what you mean about not being able to drive meaning you can't get anywhere- it was a ten minute drive or so to see my friend that lived closest to me, you can't just walk a few blocks to the store or over to your buddies or anything and I can see how that would be rough! Guess we all have to just keep on going and hope things turn out okay.
  • wow, I can only imagine how hard it would be to have something so pivotal to our every day life taken away...and for THAT long. There were a few times that I was unable to drive myself to treatment and that annoyed the crap out of me. that was only a few times. I'm sorry that he's having to deal with such a tremendous blow to his independence. I hope that his tests go well and that he'll be able to get behind the wheel again soon. keep your head up, you're a great wife and huge support for him!
  • Thanks! Things are better for the moment...ups and downs ya know!
  • you're right...ups and downs. the unfortunate fact is that there always seems to be more downs than ups. :(

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