MRI week

MRI week, we get results in two days. I'm numb right now. But I'm trying to wrap my mind around the fact that we will have to do this forever. So I have to be somewhat uplifting and here for BEN. Put my feelings aside and just do this. So that's what I'm doing. I want these to go as smoothly as possible and for Ben to feel like whatever the results are he's not alone.

I feel for him when they go to put the iv in for the dye, he has a hardcore anxiety attack. He told me it was bad today. But the guy got the needle right in so he was good. I wish I could be there by his side but I can't! I guess somethings he has to do alone. Feel helpless is not my favorite!

Letting go of the idea of control, and dealing with whatever happens happens. We can do this! It just sucks!

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