Does anyboby else want people to stop feeling sorry for them?

When people ask what happened to me and I tell them they always say "Oh, I'm sorry", but I don't need their pity. Why do they do this?

Best Answer


  • juls4juls4 Community Member
    I made a point to focus on the positive, even though there were a lot of days when that was really really tough. When I went out into the world, saw former employers or friends I hadn't seen in awhile, I always put on a big smile and acted like my old self. When they asked me how I was, I was totally honest about the roller coaster my life had become, I didn't sugar coat anything, but I always ended by sentences with, "but right now I feel great!" or "I feel lucky to have..." If you talk to them while looking sad or even just with neutral emotions, they probably don't know how to react and are afraid to be overly happy around you. I found that by being positive, it allowed them to act much more normal around me. They sometimes said, oh I'm sorry, but I would just smile and say, "I have a lot in my life to be thankful for" and usually that made the other person smile and talk to be more normally. And whenever possible, I guided the conversation to normal things like how's your family, what's new with.... For every effort I made, there was usually effort made by that person and before long that sympathy went away.