I'm so sorry you have to experience this. Cancer is rough for all involved! I can't say I can relate to your exact situation but I just wanted you to know someone cares. I am 27 and have stage IV melanoma, but sometimes I think it is easier to have the cancer than watch someone you love be so sick. I don't know what I would do without my parent's help. I don't think cancer is something you can deal well with alone, but there are people out there to support you: family, friends, co-workers (mine have been very understanding), counselors, forums... You get the idea. Maybe the people around you haven't been in your exact situation but the only way to get people to understand is to talk to them about how you're feeling. Everyone deals with a cancer diagnosis of self or loved one differently, I hope you find your way.